Hi my name is Emile and I’m realizing quickly that my grasp of how relationships work is severely hindered by my demisexuality and the fact that I’m in my first and only relationship and it’s been very successful
Like, people ask me advice on stuff pertaining to asking people out or other big steps in a relationship and my outlook is almost always positive. Because I can’t fathom asking out someone you don’t already intimately know.
Like I understand that some people can just see someone and think “wow I want to kiss you” without knowing them but my mind just… doesn’t work that way.
I don’t even find people attractive until I’ve become familiar with them (actors included because you learn about them from fandoms and it feels like you get to know them personally???)
The same thing goes for the “I love you” step of a relationship. Which I’ve had a few people ask me advice on.
Before they asked I didn’t even realize there was a time in a relationship where you didn’t say that. Because I have to already be at the “I love you” phase before I consider asking someone out.
And then there’s the times when people ask me about if they should break up with their partner because they’ve gotten bored or are interested in someone else or something like that. Like… I would say no in a heartbeat if I wasn’t rational enough to realize a dead end relationship like that is really unhealthy and also creul to your partner.
Because the idea of dating someone for the sake of dating is just… unfathomable to me. I don’t consider dating someone until I’ve decided that I’d want to spend the rest of my life with them if possible.
The same feeling goes for people that brag about how many relationships they’ve had. It doesn’t feel like something to be proud of to me, it feels like something you should be very sad about. People being super nonchalant about the end of a relationship confuses me to no end because I feel like it should be something to mourn.
I don’t know. I’m just really glad that my relationship has been so successful, because the idea of breaking up with someone you love hurts me a lot.
tl;dr: Emile thinks normal types of relationships are confusing and sometimes feels like an alien when people talk about non-demisexual relationship things.